Making it to my late 20s
Jan. 14th, 2025 05:37 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hexenprinzessinIt was my birthday recently, and yesterday I realized I have crossed the threshold of not becoming a part of the 27 Club xD Which is fucking great!
There was a time I wasn't sure how much longer I could survive on this planet. There was no immediate threat to my life or anything, though I used to feel suicidal a lot for several years, I never made any actual attempts or concrete plans. It was moreso this autistic state of "this world is too fucking much for me, at some point I very well might not be able to handle it anymore". But so far I did, and you have no idea how proud of myself I am. When I said there was "no immediate threat to my life" earlier, well, you could say just being suicidal is more than enough of a threat, so it's important for all of us to consider how strong we are for still being here despite all that.
It did get me down a little bit though, thinking that those people became legends at such an early age. It's my dream to be a singer too, and overall I'm a late bloomer in most areas of my life. But well, if that's the price you have to pay for it, your legendary status is rather more worthwhile for other people than for yourself. The "members" of the 27 Club never got to the part in life where they were lauded this way. How sad is it that a lot of the time people only get fully appreciated when they're already dead??? Let's normalize respecting and appreciating people in general, while they're around, so they know there's love for them out there! (┛✧Д✧))┛彡🩷🩷🩷
People are often made to feel bad for being a late bloomer, but it's not so bad not to have peaked in your youth. At least you'll have the best yet to come later in life, that's how I try to see it. I never used to believe it, but things really do get better! I realized that what I needed has always been within me, I just needed to learn how to nurture these good parts of myself, feed the hopeful instead of the harmful thoughts and beliefs, and I continue to learn all the time. That doesn't erase any problems coming from outside of course, but being cool with yourself the way you are has a positive influence on all sorts of things like I don't think I ever thought possible.
I'm really counting on my 30s to be "my decade" XD But I gotta say, I already feel better right now than I ever have, cheers baby! ✨
There was a time I wasn't sure how much longer I could survive on this planet. There was no immediate threat to my life or anything, though I used to feel suicidal a lot for several years, I never made any actual attempts or concrete plans. It was moreso this autistic state of "this world is too fucking much for me, at some point I very well might not be able to handle it anymore". But so far I did, and you have no idea how proud of myself I am. When I said there was "no immediate threat to my life" earlier, well, you could say just being suicidal is more than enough of a threat, so it's important for all of us to consider how strong we are for still being here despite all that.
It did get me down a little bit though, thinking that those people became legends at such an early age. It's my dream to be a singer too, and overall I'm a late bloomer in most areas of my life. But well, if that's the price you have to pay for it, your legendary status is rather more worthwhile for other people than for yourself. The "members" of the 27 Club never got to the part in life where they were lauded this way. How sad is it that a lot of the time people only get fully appreciated when they're already dead??? Let's normalize respecting and appreciating people in general, while they're around, so they know there's love for them out there! (┛✧Д✧))┛彡🩷🩷🩷
People are often made to feel bad for being a late bloomer, but it's not so bad not to have peaked in your youth. At least you'll have the best yet to come later in life, that's how I try to see it. I never used to believe it, but things really do get better! I realized that what I needed has always been within me, I just needed to learn how to nurture these good parts of myself, feed the hopeful instead of the harmful thoughts and beliefs, and I continue to learn all the time. That doesn't erase any problems coming from outside of course, but being cool with yourself the way you are has a positive influence on all sorts of things like I don't think I ever thought possible.
I'm really counting on my 30s to be "my decade" XD But I gotta say, I already feel better right now than I ever have, cheers baby! ✨
